GoateeSaver Saves Goatee but not Face

I haven’t seen my chin in 5 years and in my weakest moments perhaps the following gadget might seem like a good idea:

Then after coming back to my senses, I’d realize that one’s manhood is too high a price to pay for a properly-groomed goatee. If you can’t keep your goat straight it might be better to go with the all-out beard or maybe get to know your chin again.

If for whatever reason, you’re interested in this high-tech pacifier read all about it in the following story:

GoateeSaver, the grooming accessory for the clumsy, inept, or hungover