“Would The Devil Write it?”

A Florida church has decided that the best way for them to publicly represent Christ is to burn copies of the Qur’an on 9/11/10.

Presumably, this church headed by Pastor Terry Jones (below) adheres to the teachings of the Son of God who when asked by His opponents what the greatest commandment is, responded with this,

‘YOU SHALL LOVE THE LORD YOUR GOD WITH ALL YOUR HEART, AND WITH ALL YOUR SOUL, AND WITH ALL YOUR MIND.’ This is the great and foremost commandment. The second is like it, ‘YOU SHALL LOVE YOUR NEIGHBOR AS YOURSELF.’ On these two commandments depend the whole Law and the Prophets.


Like Hilary Faye, Pastor Terry Jones is filled with Christ’s love. As if you couldn’t tell by the suit…

I fail to see how this Qur’an burning carries out the second greatest commandment. The book burning in Acts 19 can hardly be used as a precedent. What the Ephesians did there was publicly making their repentance known. By burning their sorcery books they were saying Jesus trumps sorcery, incantations and the occult. I find it hard to believe that the folks at this Florida church are repentant Muslims.

Predictably and justifiably so, there has been public outcry over this church’s planned bonfire. Young American Muslim, a Houston Chronicle blogger, has chimed in with a post titled, Burn a Quran Day is Hateful and Ignorant.

Read more of this post

Green Power Ranger Fights For Jesus Not Al Gore

The phenomenon that was the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers came on the scene too late in my life for me to bite into and enjoy its cheesy and goofy goodness. Never understood the concept of the show, though I may or may not have had a thing for the Pink Power Ranger, too bad she only had eyes for the Green Power Ranger.

Speaking of which, the man who played the GPR, Jason David Frank, is an MMA fighter. I’m sure that to Mr. Frank, MMA fighters must seem like chopped liver compared to the giant invertebrates he had to tussle with when with the MMPRs.

Frank is also a Christian and has meshed the faith that was once for all entrusted to the saints with his chosen profession. The Houston Chronicle did a piece on him:

Jesus as the ultimate ultimate fighter

I get what he’s trying to do and to some degree it is commendable but resorting to slogans such as “Putting the Jew in jiu jitsu” is unfortunate.

With a nod to another mid 90s staple, Animaniacs, is the message of this karate studio a good idea or bad idea?

Speaking of 90s staples we all know that though the GPR might not fight for Al Gore, these guys would chomp at the bit:

Though I’m sure they’re also wondering why Mr. Gore has been strangely silent about the mess in the Gulf.

Move Over Lloyd Christmas

In that great cinematic work, Dumb and Dumber, Lloyd Christmas (Jim Carrey) asked Mike Starr’s character, “Wanna hear the most annoying sound in the world?” And he proceeded to serenade him with what, at the time, was the most annoying sound in the world. Here’s the clip:

Well, suffice it to say, that sound plays second fiddle to the drone emanating from those ubiquitous South African “stadium horns”, vuvuzelas. That infernal noise was first heard by a worldwide audience during last year’s Confederations’ Cup. They were annoying then, and they are annoying now at the World Cup.

Opinion varies as to whether these horns are “annoying irritants” or “joyful expressions of African culture”, but at the risk of sounding dismissive of other cultures, they simply are annoying and irritating expressions of joyful African culture.

Whether it’s a South African, German or Mexican (below) providing the wind power, the noise produced is equally irritating. So much so that earplugs have become a hot item in South Africa. One might conclude that the vuvuzela was a clever scheme concocted by ear plug vendors, but I digress…

I took this pic after a México win at Reliant Stadium a couple of years ago, a match which proved to be my first exposure to the glorified funnels. As horrible as the noise is, it can’t take away from the beautiful game, especially at an event like the World Cup.

However, it would be a good if somehow Univision or ESPN found a way to filter out the vuvuzela noise, as the BBC is thinking of doing.

Here are a couple of observations from yesterday and today’s action:

  • The Germans have looked the best out of all the teams that have played so far. So effortless do the Krauts look, so crisp and pinpoint their passes are, are they not? They seem to have mastered the troublesome Jabulani (the official match ball), could it be because most of their squad plays in the Bundesliga, which used the Jabulani as its match ball last season?  Things that make you go hmmm…
  • Speaking of ze Germans…  How ’bout that rousing advertisement for globalization that their squad is?  The German National Team, dubbed Die Mannschaft (insert joke here), boasts a naturalized Brazilian, a son of Turkish immigrants, a guy named Gomez (born in Germany, has a Spanish father), 2 naturalized Poles (seems to be a running gag), another guy whose father is Tunisian.  Ol’ Adolf must be turning over in his grave…
  • What is it with Italy allowing headers from Latin American teams at the World Cup?  In ’02 it was México’s Jared Borghetti and today it was Paraguay’s Antolín Alcaraz who did the honors. Like in ’02 against El Tri Italy tied with Paraguay 1-1.
  • ESPN, I know that you learned from the last World Cup and hired good announcers to man your booth but you are still lagging behind Univision’s varsity, Pablo Ramirez and Jésus “El Profe” Bracamontes.  After Italy equalized today, Ramirez sung in Italian.  That is how you do it ESPN.  When a goal is scored don’t call it like it’s a throw-in, call it “with feelin'” as Jon Bon Jovi crooned.

Finally, on a totally unrelated not, you are very welcome Baylor.

Today in Houston…

The Mexican National Soccer Team (FIFA ranking: 17), will square off against Angola’s team (FIFA ranking:85) at Reliant Stadium. It’s a friendly match which means that

  • It doesn’t count for anything except extracting my countrymen’s hard earned lawn-mowing money
  • No Barkleyesque elbows will be flung in the direction of Angolan athletes.

Because it is my beloved Tri that is playing, expect to see this in the stands,


[Photo credit: Me. Took it during a México v. Belize match at Reliant Stadium]

The festivities will em, kick off later today.  No news if the wonderful folks at the so-called Minuteman Project will stage a whinefest.

That’s today in H-town, yesterday there was a protest led by none other than “local activist”, one might say “community organizer”, Quanell X.

As one might have guessed the protest had to do with racism, perceived or otherwise. Recently, a Bellaire officer, Jeffrey Cotton was acquitted of aggravated assault on Robbie Tolan, a Bellaire youth. Sgt. Cotton shot Tolan while the latter was in his front yard. By all accounts it was a misunderstanding, since Cotton believed that Tolan had stolen a car (the officer punched in the wrong tag number).

A confrontation ensued with the boy’s mother and the officer believed Tolan was reaching for a weapon and opened fire, wounding the young man. Personally, I believe the situation could have been avoided if Tolan had simply followed orders and waited for the misunderstanding to get cleared up.

Maybe it’s just me but if a cop tells me to do something, I’m going to do it and not put up any resistance. Remember folks, there are more of them than there are of you and they carry radios (not to mention guns). Besides, if you’re free of wrongdoing then that will come out in the wash, why aggravate the situation?

Quanell the Tenth decided to stick his nose in all this because Tolan is black and Cotton is white. At the protest, Mr. Tenth said,

This cop is a criminal, this cop should be in jail. If you shoot one more black man in Bellaire in cold blood, then your damn city will go up in flames.

I find his tone very interesting. Yes, it is possible that Cotton’s demeanor was influenced by the fact that Tolan is a young black man. Young black men and the police don’t seem to get along very well. I don’t find it outside the realm of possibility that the officer might not have been so trigger-happy if Tolan was white.

That said, Quanell the Tenth just made it more difficult for young black men in Bellaire. His passionate and extremely careless threat just paints a very negative image of blacks in the minds of Bellaire residents. In their minds, he’s painting an image (if not reinforcing) of black men as being violent, hot-tempered and not too hesitant to making threats. That’s a disservice to the very people he claims to represent.

To me, it’s very similar to when Muslims get their knickers in a twist when anyone suggests that some professing Muslims have violent tendencies.

As I’ve said before,

If someone says that you have a tendency to get out of control, and you don’t like it, then probably it’d be better if you didn’t get out control with your reaction…

Penance

What does penance have to do with a Houston commuter bus? Everything.

You’d think that as a person who commutes daily in one of these bad boys, I’d be exempt from having to prostrate myself before Gaia for sins committed against her.

Wrong. Last week, on the way home, I was one of 2 passengers in one of these buses (they seat 55 passengers). I don’t know what the carbon footprint of such a colossal waste of fuel is (High Priest Al Gore couldn’t be reached) but I’ll utter 250 Hail Gaia’s.

I’ll even throw in an additional 250 for commuting for the wrong reasons. You see, my primary reason for riding the Metro has nothing to do with “saving the planet” and everything to do with saving my aging vehicle and reducing my stress footprint. If this helps “save” the planet, that’s just gravy.

In case you’ve run afoul of Gaia, here is the Hail Gaia so you too can be forgiven for your emissions,

Hail Gaia, who floats in space
Al Gore is with thee.
Verdant art thou for us humans
and verdant are those who recycle
old freezers.
Holy Gaia, Mother of all,
pray for us sinners,
now and when we buy carbon creds.
Amen

Yes, it’s a rendition of an old Catholic prayer but we do it the Vaselines’ way.

Former Aggie Ice Cream Man Stays Alive

I don’t usually dip my pen into the inkwell of state politics, but I suppose it is worth noting that Texas Governor Rick Perry won the GOP nomination for Governor of the Republic of Texas. Perry was a yell leader during his time at Texas A&M during the early 70s.

Yes, fellow Texans that was our Gov nearly 2 score ago.

Gov. Perry handily defeated former Longhorn Sen. Kay Bailey Hutchison on an “anti-Washington” platform. Let’s see how the former yell leader stacks up in the race for the Governor’s Mansion against former H-town mayor and UT Law grad Bill White.

I’m not sure how big a role Rick Perry’s secessionist tendencies will play in the campaign but I am sure that Gov. Perry wants us to know that we can tell by the way he moves that he’s a ladies’ man.

Super Best Friends: “Fill Out Your Census Forms!”


Photo credit: Houston Chronicle

Don’t know what particular faith Sheila Jackson Lee (far left, no pun intended) represents, but then again she doesn’t need any excuse or reason to put herself in front of a camera.

And where is Mother Nature’s rep, Al Gore? Click here for the story.

2050 is the new 2012

Supposedly, 2012 is the year in which the Mayan calendar ends. What some have taken from this is that 2012 will also be the year in which planet Earth becomes, with apologies to Hal Lindsey/Tim Melton (below), “The Late, Great Planet Earth”.


Have you ever seen these 2 men at the same place at the same time?

A movie was even made about this mythical 2012 date, the movie was called, *drum roll please* “2012”.

The fact that Mayans don’t buy into this 2012 hysteria has been cavalierly brushed aside in the name of sensationalistic entertainment.

Perhaps if we ask a certain slice of the American population, the year the world will end is not 2012 but 2050. Why 2050? Because of what this story reports,

White Americans’ majority to end by mid-century

So, I guess the question is, when this shift occurs what will be the consequences, if any, for this nation “under God”?

Since I’m no futurist or gypsy fortune teller, I cannot say but when I read stories like this one or hear caterwauling about how brown people are overrunning this land, I cannot help but hark back to what Chris Rock said at the end of the last millennium:

Man, the white man thinks he’s losing the country. You watch the news: ”We’re losing everything. We’re $#@?&%$ losing. ”Affirmative action, and illegal aliens… and we’re $#@?&%$ losing the country… lf y’all losing, who’s winning?”

Institutionalized

Believe what you want. These walls are funny. First you hate ’em, then you get used to ’em. After long enough, you get so you depend on ’em. That’s “institutionalized.” — Ellis Boyd “Red” Redding (below)

Red

I’ve never been in prison, but Red’s words can’t be far off the mark. Confinement will have some effect on the confined. Red was referring to humans but I think the same can be said of wild animals who are put in zoos.

A zoo, for all the wonder it generates in children, is nothing more than a prison for our furry, scaly, or feathered friends. Now, I’m not going to go as far as some and suggest that they be outlawed, but last time I visited one, it was depressing.

Check out this vid taken at the National Zoo in Washington D.C.

In the wild, this deer would be lunch for this lioness. Yet, because she’s been fed like a house cat and not allowed to chase live prey, this lioness can’t even put an end to Bambi and thus enjoy her first kill in who knows how long. The deer did eventually die from its wounds, but I doubt that the carcass was fed to the real-life Naala.

You can hear the crowd cheering for the deer but if yours truly had been there, I would have been the only one rooting for the lioness.

About the only thing “wild” that lives on in this lioness is the reluctance to jump into deep water.

Like Brooks, who Red is describing, it’s safe to say this magnificent lioness has been institutionalized.

Here’s the story the vid came from:

Tragic end for the zoo deer who leapt into a lion enclosure

Cougar Town

It has been an observation of mine that there are a lot more University of Houston students/alumni who root for the Texas Longhorns than the other way around.

This has been particularly evident after the resurgence of the UT football program under the tutelage of furniture/snake oil salesman Mack Brown. It has been my policy to look down on the bandwagon jumpin’ crowd, after all they weren’t there for Rout 66 back in the day.

Of course, one is willing to be a bit more forgiving when one catches oneself jumping on a bandwagon. I grew up in H-town and fascinated by the run-and-shoot of the UH teams of the late 80s. I remember Andre Ware winning the Heisman (more on this later) and the heights which the Cougars scaled back then.

UH

St. Gregory, Inventor of the Cougar Paw

Never in my lifetime, did I think that the UH program would jump back into the national spotlight. Especially after being left out of the emerging Big XII superconference due in part to the wishes of a capricious Governor Richards.

Being left out of the Big XII and being relegated to the Siberian exile that is C-USA wasn’t enough. Back in 2001, under Coach Dana Dismal er, Dimel they managed to run the table in reverse (0-10), thus hitting rock bottom.

Fast forward to the year of our Lord 2009, and the Coogs are #12 in the AP poll due in large part to a win over then #5 Oklahoma State in Stoolwater and last Saturday’s dramatic vic over Texas Tech. Here’s the last minute of the Tech game,

The kids on campus are following Jack Buck’s sage advice and going crazy (won’t go into the missing helmets) and the Coogs are getting some national love in the form of:

  • An appearance by Coach Sumlin on the Jim Rome Show of all places.

Even though I bleed burnt orange, I hope the Coogs run the table and make it to a BCS bowl at the end of the year. I’ll be rooting for them then unless they’re playing my beloved Longhorns in said bowl game.

I don’t know why I’m getting behind this team, it’s not a sudden onset of civic pride or anything. Maybe it’s because UH’s success takes me back to a simpler time, when Astroturf and flat tops (wait for it…) reigned supreme.

Not really sure, but what is for sure is that though neither Stifler’s mom or Stacy’s mom live in H-town, it’s beginning to look like College Football sure does. Right, Andre?

Andre Ware