Great Expectations

No, I’m not referring to Dickens’ novel but to something far more serious.  I’m speaking of something that all parents of the earth (save for Adam and Eve) have faced at one point in their life.  Yes, the timeless subject to which I refer to is PARENTAL EXPECTATIONS.  I would like to focus on one subset of this multifaceted and thus complex topic. 

I have some questions:  at what age does a married child stop meeting their parents’ expectations?  When are married children allowed to make their own decisions regarding their own children without any retribution from grandparents?  When does the guilt-tripping stop?  Can children ever do anything right in the eyes of their parents, especially when it comes to raising little ones? 

In Christian circles, it is vehemently stressed not to thump others with our Bibles.  In other words, don’t be a pushy Christian because it drives people away is what we are told.  Click here for a treatise on the subject.  

This advice to not be pushy can also be applied in the relationship between adult children and their parents.  As much as we love our parents and want to have them dote over our children, there’s only so much ‘you need to do this’ or ‘you shouldn’t do that’ that we can take.  Again I refer to the Christian who passes time telling people how sinful they are and how screwed up their lives are.  Think about this happy fellow and how much fun it is to take time out of your schedule to hang out with such a person.

So grandparents, the time for expecting things out of your grown children has come and gone.  You missed the boat when they got married and started their own family.  They’re not always going to do things the way you’d prefer.  Criticism and unwarranted advice only help in driving your adult children away.  Let me leave you with this:  Think back to when you were a new parent…    

(My lovely wife contributed to this post)

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One Response to Great Expectations

  1. kena says:

    you’re just mad that i’m the favorite now. ha ha.

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