What To Do “When Creationism Threatens”

Well if you were to ask Antoine Dodson, he’d probably tell you to “hide yo kids, hide yo wives”, but of course the NCSE (National Center for Science Education) simply wants a bit of your personal info.

Here’s a tidbit from one of their mailers:

Incidents of antievolutionary activity often require swift coordinated local action, and the fastest and most efficient way for NCSE to get in touch with its members when creationism threatens is by e-mail.

I wonder if the NCSE has considered implementing their own version of the Department of Homeland Security’s Advisory System (right).

Judging by the paranoia-laced paragraph in their mailer (“antievolutionary activity” etc.), it might not be a bad idea. What does “swift coordinated local action” entail anyway? S.W.A.T. teams armed with copies of PBS’ “Evolution” series?  A burnt offering consisting of creationist material?  A Blackhawk helicopter dispersing hundreds of anti-creationist leaflets over areas afflicted with Biblical literacy?

Then again, after the construction of AiG’s “unsettling” Creation Museum, I’m sure the terror level would perpetually reside in wavelengths greater than approx. 585 nm.

Advisory system or not, every responsible citizen should make sure to report any suspicious “antievolutionary activity” to their nearest public school. That way, they can put you in contact with the NCSE and you can file your report. Constant vigilance!

Pretty soon we’re going to have to redo the old joke: Pentecostals believe there is a demon under every rock, Baptists believe there is a Pentecostal under every rock and the NCSE believes there is a creationist under every rock.

The Ubiquitous Chicharito Tops Friday Linkage

Mexico’s rising star and child of promise, Javier “Chicharito” (Little Pea) Hernandez is everywhere. Scoring goals against the World Champs in Azteca, off his face against Chelsea in the FA Community Shield Cup; gracing the front page of the Daily Mail’s football section under “Premier League Podcast” (below, second from left), and last but certainly not least residing in the lung of a senior citizen.

The kid hasn’t played one game in the EPL and he’s put up next to League stars Fàbregas, Lampard and Gerrard. Hope the pressure doesn’t crush our beloved little pea…

and here is the smorgasbord that is, Friday Linkage:

The ‘Stros kind of get some overseas love, and yes she broke up with him but not over him letting her get hit by the foul ball...  The Faith of Katy Perry and the eventual fate of Katy Perry’s music…Yep, I’m one of these 40%ers Here’s a column titled, “America’s Biggest Jobs Program — the U.S. Military”, written by, wait for it, a Berkeley prof. Maybe not quite the inspiration for Gibby’s “eliminating the Pentagon” blast but… Apparently Jennifer Aniston drew the ire of former Inside Edition luminary Bill O’Reilly by believing it to be a good idea to drive a car with your feet. And oh by the way, Aniston paid it forward Puritan anchor babies, need I say more? Finally, we are less than a month away from seeing these boys (below) in action. #81 there to the right is all-around great guy Sam Acho, here’s a great story about him…

[Photo credit: Peter Read Miller/Sports Illustrated]

Somebody Get The Queen A Lime!

That and a good bottle of Scotch to get over her well-compensated subjects’ shoddy performance at the World Cup.

Speaking of which, the Argentina v. Germany showdown looms large this Saturday. The verbal broadsides being taken by players on both sides (not to mention Maradona) guarantee that the contest will be an epic grudge match. Can’t wait.

Finally, Vlad Guerrero busted up his former team last night to the tune of 4-for-4 with a Grand Slam and a solo shot. You think the fact that they didn’t want to resign him last off season might have motivated the man?

In case you’re wondering about the post’s title, this should help.

Men Lie More Than Women but…

Being in research, I understand that things have to be looked into, checked, double-checked and researched again to get a clear picture of what’s going on in whatever niche of creation we’re looking into. ‘Course, confirming one’s hypothesis doesn’t hurt either.

A study, well a poll, was conducted and its results have recently been revealed.

The aim of the study was to find out which sex lies the most. The poll found that it is men who lie the most. Well, let’s hang a big ol’ “DUH!” on that one. I don’t now who funded the study or how many days/months/years of research went into it but I could have told you that.

In fact, if the people who commissioned the study would have bothered to watch Chris Rock’s 1999 show, “Bigger and Blacker”, he could have told you that, the pertinent excerpt,

Who are the biggest liars, men or women? Men! Women!
Men lie the most, women tell the biggest lies.

Men, we lie all the time.
We lie so much, it’s damn near a language.

lt’s like, to call a man out for lying…is like playing basketball with a retarded kid
and calling him for double dribble….

Men, we lie all the time.

You know what a man’s lie is like?
A man’s lie is like, ”l was at Tony’s house.”
”l’m at Kenny’s house.” That’s a man’s lie.

A women’s lie is like, ”lt’s your baby.”

We’ve all heard that one.

-”lt don’t even look like me.”
-”He’s got your hat.”

Here’s Chris on his way back from Kenny’s house

[Photo credit: Photo Agency]

Carl Pelini Gets “Jiggy Wit It” in Oslo

For those of you who don’t know who Carl Pelini is, he is the defensive coordinator and defensive line coach of the Nebraska Cornhuskers. His younger brother, Bo, is the head coach. Yes, this is the dynamic duo who nearly unraveled my Longhorns drive to the national title game with their brilliant defensive game plan and a boy named Suh.

Shortly after the dramatic conclusion of the Big XII championship game, Bo and Carl stormed off the field in disgust over what they perceived was a hose job from the powers-that-be. Click here and here for excellent analysis.

According to this article, the strongest words came from Carl who allegedly said, “You should be ashamed to accept that trophy!” in the direction of the exultant Texas Longhorns who were accepting the Big XII Championship trophy at midfield.

Yesterday, President Barack Obama was in Oslo to accept the Nobel Peace Prize. Many feel that POTUS hasn’t done anything to deserve such high praise, and apparently the Pelini brothers reside in this demographic and made the roadie to Scandinavia to express themselves:

I wonder what the Fresh Prince thought of the Pelinis’ act…

Taylor Swift Takes a Picture with the Son of Toth

Confession:   I can’t name a single Taylor Swift song.

I knew who she was (the country singer who always looks like she’s about to sneeze) before Kanye West humiliated the poor girl before a national television audience. Kanye’s act that night, though earning him Presidential scorn, catapulted the man into “legend” status, particularly among the Swift Haters. Predictably his showmanship went viral, see here.

Well now, potentially, it is the affable Ms. Swift who might be in some hot water:

Taylor Swift in racism row after posing with fan wearing swastika daubed on shirt

And because we’re not exempt here at Last Row from succumbing to the occasional viral campaign (it is flu season), like a Yankee batter facing Cliff Lee, I just couldn’t lay off:

Taylor Swift

The Men In Blue Like Those Yankees

I know MLB wants the Yankees to get to the Series but this is ridiculous:

Yankees

[Original photo credit: Robert Beck/SI]

This is the play in which third base umpire Scott McClellan (on the left, “donning” Yankee gear) made a call that made Don Denkinger blush.

The Fiddler Crab on the Roof

Here is a picture of a fiddler crab:

Fiddler Crab
Photo: JUNGLECAT

As noted before, us Mexicans have a knack to gloss people based on how closely they resemble any member of the animal kingdom. In any given posse of Mexicans you may find one pajaro or caballo. A nickname frontrunner has emerged, granted his is not an animal nickname but it is an apt reference to Tolkien. Presenting 5’4″Atlante F.C. forward, Christian Bermúdez, affectionately known as El Hobbit,

El Hobbit

But I digress.

The following story features another entrant into our Animal Nickname Hall of Fame:

German arm wrestler shows off his single Popeye-esque limb

The Brit writer brands him “Popeye” but what do the Limeys know of nicknames? (see ‘Becks’) No, I’m going to go with the “Fiddler Crab”, here’s why:

The Fiddler Crab

In case you’re wondering, his name is not Tevye.

Why Did President Obama Win the Nobel Peace Prize?

For masterfully mediating the Beer Summit, of course!

BeerUPI

♫ Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name ♫

The Jedi Strike Back Against Intolerance

Look, I’m a big Star Wars guy, have been from a very early age.  Watching a group of AT-ATs inexorably march across the frigid plains of Hoth towards the doomed Rebel base left an indelible impression on my young mind.

Over the years, I have contributed to the retirement fund (not to mention the college fund of 2 portly comic store employees) of one George Walton Lucas Jr. in the form of purchases varying from DVDs, cards, PEZ dispensers, figures, posters, puzzles et al.

Yes, like many a Star Wars fan I’ve fantasized about owning a real lightsaber only to be doused repeatedly with the bucket of cold water known as the laws of physics.

I dare say that in some instances, a Jedi mind trick or two would have been nice to have up my sleeve.

Yet, when I first encountered the fact that some kooks in the UK had actually started a religion based on the spiritual ideas of the Jedi, even I thought that was a bit overboard.

What is so weird about a group of people living by the tenets of whatever came out of the head of a USC grad the Jedi Code?  In all honesty, is that much different than upwards of a billion people living by the things that came out of the head of guy from Mecca? Or a few million people living by the machinations of a dude from Vermont?

Worldwide, there are about 500,000 followers of this so-called Jedi Church.

It was only a matter of time before one of the members of this so-called church to pull the “intolerance” card.  It wasn’t just any member of the rank-and-file but the founder, Daniel Jones.  Yes, the  Grand Poo bah himself.

Apparently, Mr. Jones (cue up the Crows) went to a store in the UK in full Jedi regalia (see Obi Wan Kenobi):

Obi Wan Kenobi
Only a Sith deals in absolutes” Guess they didn’t teach logic at the Jedi Temple

Jones was told to remove the hood or leave the store. According to this story,

As a result Jones, who also goes by the Jedi name Morda Hehol, claims he has been ‘victimised over his beliefs’ and left ‘emotionally humiliated’ by the supermarket in Bangor, North Wales.

A Tesco spokesperson said,

‘Obi-Wan Kenobi, Yoda and Luke Skywalker all appeared hoodless without ever going over to the Dark Side and we are only aware of the Emperor as one who never removed his hood.

‘If Jedi walk around our stores with their hoods on, they’ll miss lots of special offers.’

How good is that? Is the spokesperson insinuating that Jones, like the late Emperor, is a Sith? Now that’s a reason to go, and to sue, which Jones is planning on doing.

Incredible. Why couldn’t Jedi Jones, er Jedi Hehol simply mind trick the cruel and intolerant Tesco employees into letting him keep his hood on?

On a side note, I wonder how long it will be until this so-called church gains a strong foothold here in the States.

What is of more interest is whether or not voices such as these,

Therefore, students should be educated about different religions as early as possible. Wouldn’t it be great if elementary school children were celebrating Eid, Diwali, Chinese New Year, and Hanukah (sic) in addition to Christmas each year in the classroom? They would learn about the traditions and cultures found within each religion and realize that each faith, at the very least, deserves to be respected and tolerated. This knowledge stays with each child so that by the time they reach adulthood, we no longer have misconceptions about basic religious beliefs and practices.

will ask for students to be educated about the Jedi Church? All you have to do is watch Episodes I-VI, right?

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